I’ve come to the conclusion that Kate was a habitual liar. She was a very abusive person, and would tell me horrible lies about her parents, and she would tell her parents horrible lies about me.
I’ve lost so much because I remained dedicated to her, I’ve lost my place in the fire academy, I’ve lost my dog, my apartment, my independence, everything.
Here is an example of what Kate would tell me about her parents:
my mom has lied about my ability to have kids, my mother told me that i would die if i got proegnet and evan wanted zach to go threw a vasectomy, and then when i questiond her about it she sayed would you rather tell your dauter she has a bad heart or she is to stupide to have kids.
my mother has threatend that i would never be aloude home agian if i wnet back with zach my fiancay and the father of are unborne child.
i lied on a court documant and am trying to fix it but mom told me that if i drop it that her or my dad will pick up one.
i was talking to a firend on the ph and mom keept picking up the ph and saying she forgot i was on the ph ! she was trying to lisen in on my conversations !
she had me put my coversations with the court people on speakerph and would not let me talk privetly with them !
i feel she is exstreamly over protective to the point of it being smuthering and abusive. i fear for my safty when i was at her place as she was vary controling and mniplitive.
she menipulated me into gardianship.
I don’t even know if Katelyn ever loved me, or if that was a lie to get me to help her. I feel like its too late to get my life back together, like its already ruined.
{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }
Zach,
It’s obvious that Katelyn loved you.
What you’re experiencing right now is the “knee-jerk” reaction that Autism Speaks is famous for. They love to tell you how people on the spectrum have “no feelings” and will destroy any trust you have in them.
It’s not true, but sometimes it can feel that way.
The truth is that when you get someone who has difficulties and you try to interact with them above their level, you will always get unpredictable responses. Katelyn was most likely trying to fit all the confusing events around her into her own “world view”.
She was probably unaware of the hurt she was causing, not because she lacks empathy but because she needed to be shown to look for that empathy.
You’re doing the best thing in moving on. At this point, you can’t help Katelyn and she can’t help you. You’re calming down now and that’s a great sign. It means that someday, you’ll be in a position to help, and to be a father to, your daughter.
I’m not suggesting you attempt custody – you’re not ready for it yet and you’ve got your own life and dreams to fulfil. Later though, she’ll be glad to know that her biological dad is around and that he loves her.
Your life isn’t ruined. It’s just beginning. Make of it what you will.
It’s probably time to close the door on Katelyn and start off in new directions. You should have a think about what you’d like to do. Blog it here; someone may be able to help you reach your goals.